Monday, October 4, 2010

When the bad mom comes out to play

Today is Monday, and I'm feeling like a big, wretched crank. It started last night, and has swiftly gone down hill into "You don't deserve to be a parent, you poor excuse for a mother" territory.

 It started last night when little Miss Sunshine decided to wake up between the hours of 11 p.m. and 1 a.m., and the only thing that could soothe the beast was watching repeated episodes of Diego (GOUGE EYES OUT NOW).

Flash forward to this morning, and Kate and I were at odds over everything. A lack of sleep was definitely a factor, and it made us both a little crazy. She dropped a little person -- scream crying. She wasn't being held while I made coffee -- scream crying. She stubbed her toe -- scream crying. I wanted her to eat breakfast instead of watching any more TV (FOR THE LOVE OF GOD) -- scream crying. I finally stomped out of the room like a toddler myself just to make sure I wouldn't start scream crying myself, which led to a full-on hissy fit (her, not me). Which then led to ANOTHER full-on hissy fit (me this time). From the other room, I yelled "Why can't you JUST STOP CRYING?!?!" Which, yes, you are right, is REAL mature of me. And of course, worked gang busters if my goal was to make my sobbing little girl sob just a TEENY TINY BIT HARDER.

Hell.

I had to give myself a quick pep talk, including a promise that there was a new pair of shoes waiting for me if I could just make it through the day without giving my kid something to tell her therapist 20 years from now. And its amazing. As soon as I picked up Kate to soothe her, all was forgiven -- I was suddenly the word's best mom, at least in her eyes. Talk about unconditional and uncomplicated love. I felt like a jerk. So for the next hour I caved on the TV front and we watched some Nick JR. snuggled up in the couch together.

What happened in the first three hours of YOUR day today?

5 comments:

therunningfamily said...

Let's see, I got pounced on by a german shepherd this morning, then watched him chase my cat up the tree, then watched cat fall out of the tree, then watched dog chase cat back up another tree. Was then all muddy and wet from dog pouncing all over me. Oh and it wasn't my dog.
You're day this morning sounds like my day yesterday.

Emily and J.B. said...

Liz, I hear ya sister! Wyatt is only 9 months, but sometimes I just have to put him in his crib and leave the room when he is having a meltdown, so I don't have a meltdown! And the promise of shoes always helps :)

Jennifer Moore said...

Awww. Liz, you are a great mom. Don't let those moments get you down.
My first 3 hours were pretty routine: nurse, get Jessica dressed, eat breakfast together, take a walk to the park, shower while she naps. And shoes wouldn't never entice me. I live in the same shoes all the time. Of course, that's party because I'm now half a size larger since having Jessica. Shopping for shoes sucks and so I have only gone once and she'll be 1 year in 2 weeks.

Jennifer Moore said...

Bummer. I notice a grammer mistake in initial comment. Ignore it please!!!!

BeagleBaby said...

Sounds like she isn't feeling well... Poor Kate! I might not be a Mom yet but I have had that same day with a child who was not mine. I was lucky that day and could send him home but I understand why you left the room and why you yelled that! This child screamed for hours... throwing himself on the floor! I knew when I stepped over him and kept on doing my cleaning - so blocking him out... that I would some day be in the same shape as you where today! lol Well my Little Miss No Name has the hiccups and is punching me because she apparently isn't happy about them! (they have lasted for about five mins!) love you!