Thursday, January 7, 2010

Mommy lesson #8

No one tells you.

No one prepares you for the fact that your beautiful, amazing, wonderful bundle of giggly goodness will make you change diapers that are so unholy they make the baby Jesus cry.

Sure, infant diapers are messy and slightly stinky. I admit it is more than just a bummer when there is a "blow-out" or what I like to call "shit storm" -- those times that there is just too much poo for one measly diaper to handle. But I toughened up. I can take it. I can take THAT anyways.

But no one warned me about solid foods, and what they do to my sweet, innocent baby. Solid foods changed Kate. They turned her into a manly pooper and I don't think there is any going back. I certainly can't go back to the time when I was innocent and unaffected by her man-poop. The first time I smelled, and then changed a turd in a diaper, I knew things would never be the same. It is just unnatural, and after I picked myself up off the floor, I decided that Kate is going to be formula fed until she is potty trained.

Problem solved.


Melody said...

yeah...I hear ya. I was shocked the first time I changed one of Cersei's, to borrow your term, 'Man-Poops'. It brought up all kinds of emotions....disgust, fear, shock, awe...well you know this all too well. Just take comfort that this too will pass, pun intended.

Brandie said...

oh my goodness! i actually laughed out loud. you are hilarious!