Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Just snip the tip

I really thought that having already had a baby, there wasn't a lot that could surprise me this go around. Except the whole "He is a boy and has boy parts" thing, which I mentioned scares me just a little. Because I am a girl. With girl parts. So, you know, the penis is a slightly foreign thing to me (Yes you jokers, I HAVE seen one thank you very much. But I haven't spent too much time pondering exactly what its like to have one ATTACHED TO MY BODY. Well, not really, although I have really questioned the whole "where does it go when you run" thing. I mean, isn't that uncomfortable? Doesn't it slow you down, kind of get in the way? Aaaaaaand, moving on).

Anyways, what I'm learning is that there is OH SO MUCH to be considered when it comes to little boy penis' (Penises? Peni?) In fact, the infant penis is a hot bed of debate these days. I'm talking about the dreaded C (that is circumcision for you lay people out there). I mean, go to any parenting forum or web site and search for a discussion about circumcision and you will find an eye-full of extremely passionate and angry citizens sticking up for their viewpoint.
  • IF YOU DO IT YOUR BABY BOY WILL HATE YOU LATER (he will likely hate us when he is a teenager anyway). 
  • IF YOU DON'T DO IT YOUR BABY BOY WILL CONTRACT AN STD OR PENILE CANCER WHEN HE IS OLDER (if he gets penile cancer, that would suck. If he gets an STD, I will kill him). 
You get the idea. Like any good debate, there are people on both sides of the fence, trying to scream the loudest. And I, in all my sensitivity, am like, "Dude. They aren't attractive no matter how you dress 'em up, just matters if they work, right? So what is all the fuss??" To which my husband sputtered a little, then muttered something under his breath and finally chose not to engage me in a discussion that would surely just annoy him and amuse me.

I'm not going to get into what side of the fence I'm on here. I could tell you what we've decided, but poor little baby E2 doesn't need a classmate to find post this some day and share with the WHOLE WORLD whether his parents decided to snip the tip or not. Besides, since according to Ben our son will be a world class athlete, his many teammates will already know whats going on down there (don't lie guys, I truly don't believe you change and shower in a locker room and NEVER check what the other guy is packing, if for no other reason but simply for comparison's sake).

So why did I even bring this up? Well, I guess what I'm sharing with you all is that I am realizing how much even a second-time parent has to learn. I'm sure this isn't going to be the last surprise after all. I'm sure babies are supposed to sleep differently, eat differently and poop differently (no? oh, good, pooping is the same these days? WHEW!) than when Kate was an infant. Which is kind of exciting and scary all at the same time. "Cause we all know how poised, elegant and classy I can be when faced with a parenting challenge. So baby E2, I'm ready for you. Penis and all.

BRING IT.

4 comments:

Nikki said...

It freaked me out to have a boy the second time around, but I have to say he's been much easier than Lily.

Deborah said...

I think it is programmed somewhere for the 2nd child to be easier b/c up until recently, Kaeleigh has been the easier of the two. Right now Kaeleigh is going through her
"terrible 3s" (if I don't have everything exactly my way my world will fall apart and I will throw a fit) LOL.. good luck with E2 :)

Anonymous said...

This is funny. I had those thoughts too, but obviously didn't have a boy. Ask Dr. Jenni about the big "C" word and the things she has seen as a dermatologist.

BeagleBaby said...

When we where thinking Kelsey might be a boy we talked about it... but that was as far as we got! Thankfully Kelsey is a girl! lol

I feel for you! Good luck!